author's note: Ryan sometime suggested Freddie should keep a diary. Freddie tried and enjoyed it a lot. Here's an excerpt from the second volume which is written when Freddie is about fourteen.

[…..]
The second incident which prompted me to realize that Caden Bailey was actually damn alright occurred when I was about ten. I was in fourth grade at school and the other kids had started to give me hard time. Sometimes it was about my clothes, sometimes about my reading books during the breaks, about my grades, about my family and usually it was about nothing at all. They simply needed somebody to pick on. 

One day, I was sitting on a bench reading “Tom Sawyer ”–yeah, I still remember that-  the others were playing football. They were always playing football. Personally, I never quite understood what was so appealing about that game which, of course, only added to my unpopularity. I liked baseball, still do. But they never played that. 

Anyway, Patrick, nasty little prick and leader of his ‘gang’, made Neill trip. Neill fell awkwardly and broke his arm. It was a big scene, but to be honest, I wasn’t very interested, they didn’t care about me, I didn’t care about them. 

The surprise came later in class after they had taken Neill to hospital and Patrick told the teacher it was me who had done it. I denied vigorously, I pleaded, but then Patrick whispered something to me about Ryan and Cade being “sick, perverted monsters”. Patrick knew what he was doing. 
I knew what he was trying to do. I didn’t care. I lost it and punched him in the face. He lost a tooth (probably a loose milk-tooth anyway). I was the baddie, of course. The teacher even said Patrick had not provoked me. I got a letter and a promise that they’d call Ryan. I was so glad that Ryan would pick me up after school that day. I just knew he’d believe me. 

I went totally numb when not Ryan, but Cade waited for me at the school gate. 

“Hey you,” he smiled at me. I mumbled a greeting and saw Cade bite his lip. “Look, Ryan has to work longer than he thought. He’s sorry he couldn’t come. I’m sorry, too,” he said as we walked towards his car. 

I’m sure he didn’t realize what that implied. Typically Cade. He said he was sorry Ryan couldn’t come and get me ‘cause that was what I wanted, but what you understood was he was sorry he had to pick me up. 

I nodded gravely and followed him. Great, now I’d have to wait until the evening to talk to Ryan. Moreover, Cade might get the dreaded phone call…This world surely hated me. 

When we were sitting in the car and I was about to fasten my seat-belt Cade caught my wrist. I flinched and struggled. I don’t know why. Cade had never hurt me in any way. Then again, he hadn’t touched me that often either, he wasn’t a big fan of hugs and cuddling. At least, I thought so. What I knew then was that Cade’s firm grip startled me. 

“What’s that ?” he wanted to know. I looked down at my hand. The knuckles were cut, swollen and starting to turn blue. No wonder Patrick now had one tooth less I thought grimly, but satisfied. 

“Nothing,” I muttered. 

Cade wouldn’t let go. “You’ve been in a fight,” he stated. 

“No.” 

“Don’t bullshit me, Freddie.”

“I haven’t done anything,” I snapped and finally pulled my hand from his grip. 

He sighed. “I know I’m not Ryan-“ he started to say, but I broke him off “No, you’re not.” 

Cade winced slightly. “You can tell me what happened though.” 

“It’s nothing.” 

“Do I have to talk to your teacher ?” 

“No!” I exclaimed.

Cade fixed me with a strange stare and to my horror I felt tears rolling down my cheeks. I looked away. Cade reached out, gently tipped my chin and made me look up at him again. “Tell me what happened,” he said. 

I don’t know why, but I did. I told him all that had occurred, I was babbling and blubbering, but he listened patiently. 

“Look at me and tell me you make Neill trip,” he asked when I had finished. 

“I didn’t make Neill trip,” I said. He nodded and unfastened his seat-belt. 

“But I did punch Patrick!” I added hastily. 

Cade gave me a wry smile “I know. Let Mr. Dawson be my concern.” He got out of the car and opened my door. 

“What are you doing ?” I sniffed. 

“I’m going to enlighten your teacher.” 

“She won’t believe you.” 

Cade frowned  “Get out of that car, Freddie.” 

I hung my head and crawled out. I honestly didn’t believe Cade would seriously do anything for me. Not that I thought he was stupid, but I supposed, eventually, he’d give in and believe her version. Then, a part of me didn’t want him to do anything. I’d only get into more trouble. Cade threw the door shut, took my uninjured hand in his and dragged me back to the school building. 

“She’s probably already gone,” I whined. 

“We’ll see. Where to ?” 

I lead him to the teacher’s room. “I don’t think she’s there,” I tried again. 

Cade released my hand and squatted down in front of me “What is it you want ? You want to get expelled for something you didn’t do ?” 

“No…” 

Cade got up again “Then what, hm ?” I didn’t answer. 

“You wait here.” He knocked, opened the door and I heard him ask for my teacher, then the door closed and I was left alone. 

Twenty minutes later, which seemed like twenty hours later, Mr. Hollins stepped out. I briefly overheard Cade talking, his voice perfectly calm but unusually cool. Then Mr. Hollins closed the door again. 

He smiled at me “Hey Freddie. How are you ?” 

I attempted a smile back “Fine, thank you.” I liked Mr. Hollins. He was our arts and music teacher, quite young and a friend rather than an intimidating authority. His lessons were fun and interesting, that was rare. Right then, however, I wished he weren’t always that cheerful. 

Mr. Hollins, of course, picked up on my rotten mood and I am sure he could see I had been crying. “That your uncle in there ?” 
I shook my head “No, my uncle’s friend.” 

He studied me briefly and I felt myself blushing. He smiled again “Ah. Well, you’re lucky to have him on your side. He’s cutting Mrs Price to ribbons.” Before I could say anything, he winked at me and left. 

After five more minutes the door opened again and another teacher I didn’t know exited. She left the door open. 

I heard Cade talking, his voice had even dropped several degrees “….disgusting prejudices should not teach. If you should ever again only vaguely consider treating my boy any less for no obvious reason but your lack of insight, your intolerance and your incompetence as a teacher you’ll be left with nothing but what you wear faster than you can form a coherent thought. I assure you, I have the means. I regard the problem to be solved and as such nonexistent for Frederick. Do I make myself clear ? - Good.” I heard a chair being pulled over the wooden floor, then “Have a nice day Mrs Price.” 

Cade stepped out and grabbed my hand again “Let’s get out of here.” His grip was firm and actually it hurt as he dragged me back to the car. 

I whimpered, but he didn’t seem to notice. I wanted to cry for the second time that day. Why was he being like that ? Didn’t he just stand up for 
me ? Didn’t Mr. Hollins just say so ? Didn’t he call me ‘his boy’ ? It never occurred to me that Cade didn’t think of hugging me right now, he didn’t think that’s what I wanted and needed. 

Cade stopped in front of the car. “Where’s the letter ?” he reached a hand out. 

I hurriedly searched through my bag, retrieved the envelope and handed it to him. Cade took it, ripped it apart twice and threw it into the rubbish bin next to the school gate. Without another word, he opened the door for me and I got in. Without another word, he got in next to me and drove back home. 

I headed straight for my room, but Cade called me into the kitchen. He reached for me and I, for the second time that day, backed away. 

Cade frowned and squatted down in front of me “What’s wrong, Freddie ? I’m not going to hurt you.” 

“Why not ?” I snapped. 

He looked like if I had actually slapped him “Why should I do that ?” 

“I caused you all that trouble today.” 

With a sigh, Cade let himself drop down on the floor, his arms rested on his knees. “You didn’t cause that trouble,” he shook his head, “And you didn’t cause me any trouble.” 

“You’re not mad at me ?” 

“No, I’m mad at your teacher, I’m mad at the world, but not at you.” I frowned. 

Cade leaned forward “Now, let me see those little fingers of yours.” He reached out again and I, hesitantly, placed my injured hand into his palm. 

Wrinkling his nose he looked up at me “Who taught you to punch like that ?” 

“Ryan…,” I murmured. 

“Figures,” he grinned, “Come on, I’ll put something on it to ease the pain.” With that, he grabbed me and sat me on the edge of the kitchen table. 

“Will you have to give Patrick money ?” I asked while he very carefully rubbed some cream into the damaged skin of my knuckles. 

“Not if I can help it,” he snorted. 

“How did you know I said the truth ?” I wanted to know. 

Cade tilted his head. “Firstly, I wouldn’t have believed what they said anyway ‘cause your just not the type. Secondly,” he looked me in the eyes and smirked, “All Adenvishays are bad liars.” 

“You can tell when I lie ?!” 

“Yes,” he nodded. 

“How ?”

Cade laughed. It made me feel strange to know I had made him laugh, I hardly ever managed to do so. 

“Like I’m going to tell you, no way!” he chuckled. 
[…..]
 
 

[ return ]
 

Prior: I'm not ... distracted, I'm doing research. Harper: On Mormons ? Prior: On ... Angels. I'm a ... an Angelologist. Harper: I never met an angelologist before. Prior: It's an obscure discipline.